You’re either sensitive or you’re not. You either feel something, or you don’t.
Calling someone too sensitive is a form of control.
How can one measure the degree to which you should feel things?
It is often said by those who don’t want to take ownership of how you received their words. It’s like they want carte blanche to be a jerk whenever it pleases them.
It is an attempt to cheapen your soul. Your heart. Your vulnerability.
It typically comes from someone who doesn’t want to be held accountable for your human experience based on their words or actions. Good or bad.
It is dismissive. It is an attempt to devalue your truth.
“I was only joking…can’t you take a joke?” I’ve heard that from a very young age and for decades, since.
A caveat-we all misread or make mistakes…
When someone says “it was only a joke”, but you didn’t find it funny, you found it hurtful, and you’ve expressed your feelings, they do have an opportunity accept that its a “no-fly-zone.” As long as they don’t go there again, I believe they deserve to be taken at face value and given a second chance.
But. Knowledge is power. If they go there again, knowing what they know? Adios. Period.
You likely already concern yourself with how your feelings impact others. If you fear you over reacted, ask someone you trust. Namely, someone who has never attempted to invalidate your feelings. :)
Remember, be open to the feedback but you must also trust your gut.
Give yourself a chance to reflect. There is only gain to be had in growth.
Sometimes you realize it may not have been worth whatever reaction you had. A knee-jerk response, perhaps filled with misconceptions…or preconceptions…
And sometimes that time of reflection brings crystal clear clarity. No take backs, whatsoever.
And that is okay.
For the longest time, I thought that my “sensitivity” was a major weakness. My heart on my sleeve was a fragility.
Boy, was I wrong.
It is, in fact…my superpower. I am living “my” truth.
The reality is that a knock/diss on your “sensitivity level” can come from anyone, at any time. Romantic partners, family, work, friends, strangers. I find that it’s most hurtful coming from those who truly hold your heart.
Sadly, the world is full of people who actively attempt to deny your emotional experience in order to maintain control…if you let them. Only you can do that.
The good news? There is no such thing as being “too sensitive.” Remember?
You either feel or you don’t feel. Good feels and bad. All valid.
You are the keeper of your feelings and only you have the power to decide if it was an overreaction or an under reaction.
Only you have the power to decide whether your reaction is valid in whatever situation you’re facing.
Don’t trade your feelings for their acceptance (because it doesn’t exist.)
Anyone who actively dismisses your feelings (no matter who it is), seeks to invalidate you.
Those are not your people.
I no longer surround myself with people who try to dismiss my emotional existence. My “feelings.”
Those are not my people.
My feelings are mine. I own them. I always have.
I wouldn’t have it any other way.
There’s no such thing as being “too sensitive.”